Saturday, December 15, 2007

A Letter

To whom it may concern,
I'd like to officially opt out of the need to sleep. With 6 to 8 additional hours every day, I could have this, this, this, this, and this, and this, and this, and a pair of these, and a few of these knit up in no time at all. Now, I'm sure your very busy and get a lot of requests like this. And I have made many attempts to forgo sleeping on my own. But I would not call any of them successful. Without exception, they've resulted in things like my daughter walking around muttering, "Where did my Mom go, and who is this cranky crazy lady?" Or embarrassingly frequent incidences of me walking into a room thinking, "I know I came in here to do something if I could just remember what it was........." I thank you ahead of time for your cooperation on this matter.


P.S. If you could kindly point me in the direction of who I need to speak to about no longer needing to shower, it would be much appreciated. Specifically, if I could just take one shower and have it be enough to keep me sufficiently clean for the next 50 to 60 years that I plan to be here. Twenty minutes a day may not sound like a lot, but it really adds up over time. I've attempted to take that matter into my own hands as well, but I really missed having my friends come around.


Tot's Mom said...

Got here through Blog Catalog.
I laugh reading that letter. Guess you must be really, really hoping to have more time on your hands when you came up with that!

Lis said...

Let me know if you do get a response. I'll love to know how I can squeeze in more knitting time too (note to self: cutting down Ravelry time is one way)!

a friend to knit with said...

oh my gosh. that is so great!
me too. wouldn't it be so great with out sleep! we could both have all of those sweaters knit, as i love them all also!

Fig and Feather said...

I've been saying the same thing for weeks! Thank you for writing the letter, can we make it a petition? I'll be the first to sign on.